Pamukkale, winter catches up with us

Having spent most of the day at Aphrodsias our next stop was Pamukkale, which is the site of an extraordinary natural phenomenon, albeit one with added classical ruins. You will have to bear with me because my knowledge of geology is limited in the extreme, but what I do know is that there are hot springs, and the water / soil it flows through is rich in calcium, with the result that the springs deposit travertine (which seems to be a kind of chalk) on its way out. The result is a series of pools and odd formations, a little like land-locked clouds, covering the whole of one side of a hill above the town of Pamukkale. As I am coming to expect in Turkey, the Romans got here first, (In about 200 A.D) and built a spa town called Hieropolis at the top of the hill, where the springs are. There is also a cave which vents deadly poisonous gas, apparently, but these days you are no longer permitted to throw members of your party into it see whether the gods are feeling kindly disposed toward you….

They believed that only the eunuchs who served in the temple there were immune.

Until recently, visitors used to be allowed to bathe in the pools of travertine, but due to concerns about ecological damage this is no longer allowed, and you are also required to take off your shoes if you want to walk down the hill on the travertine.Having arrived at about 3.30, we started from the bottom and walked up: Bizarrely, there was no-one at the bottom to say we were supposed to have taken our shoes off, so we didn't. (But we were all wearing fairly soft soled shoes, so I don't think we would have done any more damage than in bare feet)It was getting dark by the time we got to the top, so after a quick look around and taking some atmospheric sunset pictures, we walked back down again - this time we did take our shoes off, which meant very chilly feet, as it was fairly cold to start with, due to the height and the time of year, and when you add to that the sun having gone down .

However, I'm sure that the chalk/travertine exfoliating pedicure will catch on soon, and the advantage to being cold is that once your feet start to go numb you don't notice the occasional pebble underfoot so much!It really is an extraordinary phenomenon.(It’s also a UNESCO World Heritage Site.) Pamukkale translates as ‘Cotton Castle’ and that’s a pretty good description of the way it looks from below. From further away, it is less impressive as it looks rather light an oversized quarry, until you get close enough to see the formations.

Having worked up healthy appetites with our brisk walk up and down the travertine, we headed back to our hotel (Nice, although not as quirky as the last one) – happily, K&C had had the foresight to prepare and bring some pre-mixed gin & tonic to sustain is as we changed and waited for supper. . .

We had not had time to look around Hieropolis, or to see or visit the antique pool, which is the one place you can now swim in the spa waters. We spent a lot of time during the evening debating whether to go back in the morning (influenced in part by the fact that this would mean paying the entrance fee a 2nd time, (20ytl (about £9 / $13) each, plus the same again for the pool itself)

However, we decided that it would be fun to do. Actually, to be completely honest, I decided that I would like to do it, and the other 2 agreed. Overnight, they changed from considering coming to watch, and mock, and take pictures, to deciding to come swimming too, and afterwards admitted that they were glad I had, as they were pleased to have done it, afterwards…

We were a little disconcerted when we came out of the hotel after breakfast to find ice on the car windscreen – considering that only a little over 48 hours earlier we had been sitting on the sea front in t-shirts drinking chilled beer. . . and of course more of a shock to K&C’s systems than to mine, as I was only enjoying a frost-free respite, whereas they have been in Turkey since September, and so it was their first frost of the winter. After a short detour to an ATM (as we discovered that the hotel didn’t take cards, and we had no cash – they must have decided that we did have honest faces, though, as they had no problem with all three of us plus our baggage disappearing to find an ATM, despite their knowing nothing of us but an e-mail address…) we went to the ‘top’ entrance to Hieropolis, where you can get in without having to walk all the way up the travetines again, and went in to the antique pool. The pool is an open air one and it on the site of the old Roman healing pools (The springs were, it would appear, believed to cure just about anything, and are still trumpeted as being good for you, a claim which is, to my mind, only slightly called into question by being displayed immediately under a big sign warning that youshouldn’t go in the pools if you have high blood pressure, heart problems, and a whole list of other symptoms. . .)

It still contains large chunks of the original masonry, so you can recline on original marble pillars while you bathe, if the fancy takes you.

As it was very cold, and the changing areas completely unheated, we changed extremely fast. I had discovered when backing for the road trip that I had only packed my skimpy ‘wearing into the Hamman’ bikini, not my swimming costume, and was regretting the loss of the few inches of extra coverage that this would have given, and the potentially lower heat loss as a result.

Then we got into the pool.

Where the water temp. is around 36-38 degrees centigrade (about 96-100 Fahrenheit). And it was wonderful.

As well as being hot, and full of (possibly healing) minerals, the water is absolutely crystal clear. For most of our swim, we had the pool to ourselves (there was one man, who I think may have been an employee, who was in the pool when we got in and for the first 15 minutes or so) It really was amazing.

When we got out, the chill was very noticeable, and we may have broken some world speed records for getting dry and changed. I have to say, though, that once out an dry it felt great – I’ve never had a proper Scandinavian, rolling in the snow sauna, but I suspect that may feel quite similar, and for much the same reasons!

We didn’t have time to visit the whole site at Hieropolis so contented ourselves with walking back down to the car-park, through the Necropolis – it would appear that the healing waters were not successful for every visitor, and so a lot of them ended up being buried here. For reasons of hygiene, no burials were allowed in the city of Hieropolis, so they are all in the Necropolis, and some have been engulfed by the travertine.

Odd.

But interesting.

Aphrodisias

From Selcuk we went to Aphrodisias – about 175 Kilometres from Ephesus. It’s a lot further inland and much higher up, (about 1,900 feet above sea level) which meant it was much colder, although most of the day was bright and sunny we definitely needed coats!

The city is on plateau in the hills so there are stunning views in all directions, and it was almost deserted.

If Ephesus is impressive, Aphrodisias is utterly mind-blowing. It covers an even larger area (and there are huge areas which haven’t yet been excavated.
Historically, it was named for Aphrodite and as it was sited near several marble quarries it became famous for sculpture. The temple of Aphrodite was turned into a Christian church in the 5th century, by moving walls and pillars to almost turn it inside out.


The gates / portico from one end is still standing, together with quite a few pillars – it must have been an immense building. They know, from inscriptions, that the temple, and the theatre, were paid for by a leading citizen named Zoilos, who is believed to have been a freed slave – possibly a slave to the Emperor.

Most of the ruins date back to the 1st & 2nd Centuries AD, and most are still in situ although some of the carvings have been moved into the museum or to Istanbul.

These are the original masks from a frieze above the stage in the theatre, which have been moved under cover

There is a stadium, which could seat around 30,000 and is one of the largest and best preserved in the world –

It still has the original entrances through which the participants would enter – one of these has been excavated so you can see the original ground level, several feet below the current level.

The whole structure is huge, and so well preserved you can still see the carvings on some of the seats saying who they were reserved for, and the places where ropes were fixed (for awnings?)

There are the remains of the agora (market places) and Baths, and houses.

And there was another Amphitheatre – even better preserved than the one at Ephesus. As it was almost deserted I gave in to my inner drama queen and took the opportunity to give it my best Shakespearean soliloquy (To be or not to be, since you ask. It’s the only one I know well enough to do without prompting)

I doubt that it would score highly in terms of acting ability but it’s an amazing feeling, and the acoustics, even without the rear wall, are amazing!

It's too small and far away to see properly, but that is me on stage (wearing my ‘Graveyard Book’ Neverwear shirt!)

There were pomegranate trees among the ruins – they had shed all their leaves, but the fruit were still on the trees, burst open like flowers.

And there were, of course, more archaeological cats.

We also went into the museum, where some of the more delicate statues and carvings have been moved, including most of the originals from the Sebasteion (Temple of Deified Emperors) which included one of Claudius (who I always think of as Derek Jacobi) conquering Britain.

On a few of them you could see traces of colour, where the stautes were originally painted (very garishly, if the research is to be believe

Apparently, builders in the 1st century were no more reliable than they are today – there is archaeological evidence that some of the statues were put up in the wrong place, so they have the wrong ‘captions’!

This entire place is stunning - I found it more so than even Rome or Athens - perhaps because it is less familiar. The really amazing part is how little of the site this represents. There were various ditches and other holes in the ground which (to the untrained eye) seemed to be natural rather than man made; you'd just look down and see half a classical pillar sticking out - there were also a group of 6 or 7 pillars standing amidst a clump of trees and brambles, which didn't seem to be important enough to be fenced off or labelled...

This (below) is the Sebasteion - the reliefs on the building to the left are copies (the originals are in the museaum, but the rest of the building is original. And roughly 2000 years old.

What I Did On My Holidays - Part VI - Selcuk

We stayed at Selcuk, which is the ‘modern’ town closest to Ephesus (‘Modern’ in that the ruins only date back to the 6th Century . . )

We stayed at a guesthouse – Homeros Pension, which is a lovely family run place – worth some pictures of its own. Much of the furniture was made by Dervis, who runs the place with his sister and mother, and it feels closer to staying in a family home than an hotel.

We checked in, then wandered off to look around the town until supper time. Selcuk has a rather impressive looking citadel on a hill, and also the ruins of the 6th Century Basilica of St John (which was later converted into a mosque, fell down in an earthquake in the 14th Century and was excavated in the last century). Apparently, St John came to Ephesus & Selcuk in around 60 AD, and again in 97 AD (Which suggests to me that either he was very very young when he was a disciple, or very very old when he came to Turkey, or not very good at counting…) Or maybe all three. The basilica which was built in the 6th century replaced an older one which was destroyed in an earthquake.

We also found the remains of a roman aqueduct in the town, and (because that’s the kind of family we are) also found a very nice bar (whose name I forgot) where they gave us free freshly popped popcorn, and other nibbles to go with our beer.
Our meal, back at the pension was delicious. No such thing as a menu, we just turned up when we had been told to and were served with Mamma’s cooking – spicy soup, chicken, Turkish ‘pilaf’ (rice), and 2 or three other dishes of vegetables and salads, all served with wonderful fresh crusty bread and local wine. (99% of Turks are Muslim, but there is a secular government ands rules about alcohol are pretty relaxed – the local wines are unbelievably cheap – my sister buys local wine in their corner shop for around 3.5Lira a bottle, (which translates to around £1.50 or $2.25) and are very drinkable…) Despite it being out of season there were several other people staying – from as far afield as the US, Australia and Korea, so the evening was spent swapping traveller's tales. I can’t recommend it too highly for anyone who finds themselves in or near Selcuk.

Ephesus

Difficult to describe – Ephesus (Efes) was the site of the temple of Artemis, one of the 7 wonders of the world, but that no longer exists. (I think there may be part of one piller somewhere, but we didn't identify it) So as you can see, there is nothing at all worth looking at, at all, any more….!

One of the things which strikes you is just how big the place is. There are several paved roads, the reconstructed library, one large and one small ampitheatre, various temples, and lots and lots of cats. (it's possible that the cats are not quite as ancient as the rest of the site)

The cats (not only here, but all over Turkey) seem to be semi-feral. They don't appear to belong with anyone specific, but they do seem to be encouraged rather than merely tolerated. I never saw anyone doing anything more then shoo them gently away (out of restaurants, for instance) and lots of people seem to put food out for them - I noticed little heaps of kibble, in the parks.

This is the street running down to the Library -

And this is the library of Celsus - it had collapsed, and the facade was rebuild, using the original pieces. Apparently when it was originally built it had to be 'slotted in' between other buildings, so the pillers were made different sizes to make it look wider and more imposing than it truly is. (Although I have to say, it's pretty imposing!)

The larger of the 2 ampitheatres. This one seated 25,000 people. Apparently they had gladiators there, as well as theatre and public debates.


Another of the street - the large ampitheatre is the bit on the right (by the crane). The crane seems to be there as they are doing some work shoring up the back wall of the theatre - but it doea make you think what a huge undertaking this must have been when it was origianlly built, with no such help.

I may be very ignorant, but until we visited, it had never occurred to me that the Ephesians to whom St Paul wrote his Epistles were the residents of Ephesus... St John and the virgin Mary apparently came, too. I also didn't know, before we came, that the city used to be a port, with a harbour to the sea, and this was one of the reasons it became such an important city (It was the Roman administrative capital for about half of Asia Minor) - then from about the 4th Century AD the harbout silted up and the city went downhill (as it were). It's about 3 miles inland, now.


Across the valley is the 'Mary's House' - alledgedly where Mary spent her decling years - the house was found after a local residenct had a prophetic dream. It's now a major pilgrimage site and tourist attraction. A cynical person but become suspicious...

We didn't go, so it is always possible that I missed the opportunity for a deep and meaningful spiritual experience. I have to admit that my first thought was that if the site is accurate, it was most unkind of the early church to build a house for an elderly lady right at the top of a steep hill and right away from the city....

We spent several hours exploring the site - I would imagine that in the summer it is packed with coach parties, and it was wonderful to have the opportunity of seeing much of it almost alone.

Terror on the roads

While there were obvious attractions to remaining in Fethiye for the whole holiday, we had planned to explore further afield and so K & C had hired a car for 3 days. This is much more courageous than you might suppose, unless you have had the experience of seeing how the Turks drive.

The first thing you learn, as a pedestrian, is that you are invisible. I am not entirely sure what function a zebra crossing has in Turkey: maybe it is simply designed to keep all the casualties tidily in one place. Certainly, anyone who assumes that because there is a pedestrian crossing that the traffic may stop for them is in for a sudden and nerve-wracking surprise.

When you get into a car, you realise that a similar laissez-faire attitude applies to most other rules of the road as well. Over taking is, it would seem, permitted anywhere. I assume that the ‘no-overtaking’ signs are some sort of national disclaimer – it’s not so much that you can’t over take, just that you have only yourself to blame if things go wrong. Overtaking the van which is overtaking the truck which is going up the steep hill approaching the blind bend is also popular, and of course mopeds are free to drive either way along any road.

After travelling for a while, however, you start to notice that the chaos is slightly more organised than first appears. People drive right over in the right hand gutter, which makes the overtaking easier, and no doubt it helps that there are many fewer drivers than there are here in the UK (at least, a lot fewer per square mile…)

But I wouldn't want to drive, and my admiration for my sister for doing so increases by leaps and bounds. (And worryingly, she adopted the Turkish attitude to driving remarkably quickly and enthusiastically)

Rain!

It was a shock to the system to be rained on a little the following morning, although, as we were attending a Christmas Fayre in the morning it did add a little seasonal feel to be drizzled upon. The fayre was run by ex-pats (mainly British & German) and had a ‘village fete’ feel to it – tombolas and cake stalls etc, plus also several Turkish traders selling scarves and jewellery. We were going in order to support some of K&C’s neighbours, who were running the cake stand. We indulged in German apfeltorte, to sustain us as it was over an hour since breakfast, and some bread pudding (as marching rations for our road trip) then had a very extended lunch, at a restaurant on the end of the beach, which therefore has 270 degree views over the bay. . .

For much of the bay the water is incredibly shallow and we could watch several fishermen wading out to their pots, way out to sea but still only knee deep in the water. I guess it’s important to know where the channels are.

The Advantage of a Poor Start

One of the advantages of having a crap start to a trip is how much you appreciate it when it stats to improve!
Having left England with temperatures of around 3 degrees C in the daytime, and heavy frosts at night, it was lovely to find that, once the sun was up, T-shirts were entirely suitable garb… temps of 18-22 degrees and trees full of ripe oranges and lemons everywhere. Kat & Chris, on the other hand, were starting to feel it was getting a little chilly, so our first outing was to the local market, to buy some rugs for the floor, as well as buying fruit and veg. Exhausted by the task of selecting oranges, and learning the Turkish for cucumber, we decided we were in need of a little sit-down… With Pelicans.

And Beer.

The Pelicans were not really supposed to be there, they stopped off, a few weeks ago, possibbly because one of them was ill, possibly just becasue they relaised they would get free fish. They have become very popular. They have not yet quite learned how to order from the menu - currently they try pecking the menu, the table, passing waiters.... But I'm sure its just a matter of time.

Incidently, their beaks are incredibly pliable, and bendy (all of it, not just the pouch) - quite soft, but with lots of teeny tiny serrations all along the edge (presumably to keep the fish from falling out). This pair seem to have given up on the option of catching their own fish, and prefer to stand around looking plaintive and occasionally trying to eat a table or chair, until somone gives them some fish. It doesn't seem a bad lifestyle...

What I Did on My Holidays: Part I

It did not begin well. Due to the cost of airport parking, and the not wanting to have to drive around (especially around Heathrow) when it was cold, and dark, and I was tired, I decided to start my journey by train. I was organised. I checked the time table and the connections. I re-checked, an hour before setting off. I checked the display boards when I got to the station. All were unanimous. The first train would come at 19.14, which would give me 8 minutes to change trains in Bath, en route for London. And it would have worked, I’m sure, if the train company had played there part by sending the train. So, with that, and with the next train being delayed, I didn’t get to Heathrow until Midnight, instead of arriving as planned at about 9.45. It’s just as well that I had planned to sleep at Heathrow (In a funky little Pod hotel), as I would have been very much more stressed had my flight been in the evening not the following morning.

The ‘Yotel’ Pod was rather sweet and the bed was very comfy. I slept, and arose refreshed for the first of many breakfasts.

My flight was on time, less than half full and therefore peaceful and comfortable. Changing planes in Istanbul slightly less so – the international and domestic terminals are quite a long walk from one another, and the domestic terminal was packed, as it was the Friday before the start of the Eid El Ulna festival on Monday (‘Feast of the Sacrifice’, which is festival, when everyone goes home to be with family, so my travelling was pretty much the equivalent of getting a flight on Christmas Eve…so the flight to Dalaman was absolutely packed. I felt quite fortunate in having actually got the flight to Dalaman, however, as due to various delays, cancellations and gate changes for a lot of flights, a very poor quality announcement system (poor sound quality; not even the Turkish passengers could make out what was being said) and an apparently arbitrary approach to buses I was half expecting to find myself on a flight to Antayla, or any one of a number of destinations…

It was therefore particularly nice to be met at the airport by my sister, Kat, and driven home (by one of her neighbours, who has a car) to a hot meal, drinks, and bed.

.

In which I am, once more, outwitted by my car...

As those who know me will know, I am not mechanically gifted. I can drive my car. I can put petrol and oil and water and air into the correct parts of it, I can (and, perhaps more importantly, I do) check the tyre pressure, and since the whole issue with blowing up the engine that one time, I check the oil, too. I have even, on one occasion and on principal, changed a wheel.

However, that’s the limit. And (confession time) I don’t actually understand it. I believe that at some point the petrol explodes, which when you stop to think about it does not seem a terribly safe or sensible way to get around, but most of the time, it works, and I don’t question it. (It’s like plane travel – it’s important not to start wondering how it works while you’re in flight, in case it notices you doing and stops working)

So, when I was driving to work and an exciting orange light came on on the dashboard, I didn’t hesitate. No. I panicked. Then I pulled over to investigate. The light said ‘ABS’, which, to my powerful intellect suggested that (a) My car has ABS and (b) something was wrong with ABS. The manual helpfully suggested calling my garage (which I would, of course, NEVER have thought of on my own) Slightly more helpfully, it referred to ‘limp home mode’, which implies that one can drive it as far as the garage at least, without blowing up the engine, which, as I learned the hard way, is not true every time you try to drive to the garage with a light on on the dashboard. . . .

So, I drove, cautiously, the rest of the way to work, waited until the garage opened and gave them a ring. They know me, and my car. They service it regularly, repair it when it gets broken, and forbore from laughing at me and rebuilt the engine after the regrettable incident with the last light…

So, the plan was that I would take my car over to the garage, they would give me another one in exchange for the day, fix mine, and everything would be OK.

That was the plan.

When I got to the garage, my little car was hooked up to a diagnostic thingy.
It turns out that the ABS includes sensors. These, I am led to believe, allow the car to know if it is falling over, and to slow it down if it is. (Good to know, as if I’m going to fall over in my car, I want to be sure I do it slowly.)

Replacing the sensors apparently takes about an hour , and there was a queue, which of course is not a problem if you’re having a courtesy car.

Which was the plan.

The plan, sadly, did not take account of the fact that the previous driver of the courtesy car, due to return it ½ an hour before I arrived, had driven it into a ditch.

So I had to go away, still driving cautiously. On the way home, we had fun, with the car deciding at perilous moments (Such as while driving slowly along a flat, straight bit of road, for instance!) that we were falling over and therefore it should put the brakes on.. This makes for interesting driving.

Happily, I was able to take the car back the following day, I got to borrow a shiny pink Smart car for the day and now I have new sensors, and a car which no longer thinks that it is falling over.

Of course, there are also at least 6 other lights on the dashboard which have not had their day in the limelight yet . . .

Terry Pratchett in Bath

I only heard, quite recently, that PTerry was going to be in Bath – He was there for a recording of the Radio 4 programme With Great Pleasure to be broadcast on Christmas Day.

The tickets were free, but as the BBC want a full audience they send out more tickets than the number for seats, so, knowing how popular Terry is, I decided to get there early. Unusually, I managed to leave work promptly at 5, and so arrived outside the venue The Forum (Which started life as a 1930’s Art Deco cinema, is now an evangelical church) at about ¼ to 6, by which time there were already around 150 people queuing, so, pausing only to pick up some coffee and fries from the Evil Empire Junk Food Emporium across the road, I joined them.

45 minutes and some interesting conversation later (by which time the queue stretched back around 3 sides of the building, although as the auditorium seats around 1500 I don’t think there was anyone who didn’t get in. I ended up sitting about 4 rows back from the stage, which was good.

The format of the programme is that the subject picks poems or passages from books which they enjoy, or which have been important to them – a bit like ‘Desert Island Discs’, but with literature instead of music. The chosen passages are introduced by the subject – Terry, in this case, and read/performed by actors. (Unfortunately, as I have a poor memory for names, I can only remember that one of them was Helen Atkinson-Wood –I can’t remember the other two)

As this was a recording for a radio programme, it started with the producer (A very pleasant lady who reminded me of the nicer kind of school teacher) came out to explain what would happen, to remind us to turn of all mobile phones, (both because of the recording, and also, as she pointed out, because if your phone goes off everyone will look at you and you’ll feel like a pillock!) and also that we were asked not to leave immediately at the end in case any re-takes were needed. After a moment to practice “Rapturous Applause”, Terry and the actors came on.

After a brief pause caused by Terry having left his script backstage, in all the excitement, and some genuinely rapturous applause caused by, y’know, rapturous PTerry fans, we were off.

Terry introduced each piece – we started off with a reading from “The Specialist” by Charles Sale (the titular character being a specialist in building privies..) and ended up with Charles Darwin, going via the Bible, The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, Sir George Caley and Roy Lewis and many others. Terry had lots of lovely little stories – for instance, in introducing the reading from Michael Ayrton’s The Maze Maker (A book I had never previously heard of, which is a novel written as an autobiography of Daedalus) Terry talked about being a ‘one-time bee-keeper’, and having been inspired by the book to take silver-smithing classes and make a honeycomb and bees..

There was a wonderful reading about the Victorian Post Office, which Terry came across in researching for Going Postal - sadly I didn’t catch the title, so have not been able to track this one down.


We also learned that Leonardo da Vinci, while being (Terry granted) “a dab hand with a paintbrush” was (and I quote) “Pants” when it comes to Aircraft…

Terry had picked one reading from the Bible (Job), but made it clear he is not a believer (or as he put it, “I think the only thing likely to strike me on the Damascene road would be friendly fire..)

Terry also talked about his love of poisons, and the unfortunate Victorian ladies dying of arsenical poisoning as a result of the dye in their ballgowns.

After the main part of the programme ended there were a very small number of re-takes (from which it became clear that Terry was speaking from notes, not a formal script, as it was slightly different each time.

After this, as it was BBC Children in Need night, Terry had donated a signed, limited edition copy of
Nation which was auctioned for the charity, raising £750.

Terry then waited to sign anything anyone wanted signing, which was an unexpected bonus, so far as I was concerned. I hadn’t brought any of his books with me as I had not expected him to be signing, but I did wait to get my ticket signed, mainly for the opportunity to say hello, and tell him how much I had enjoyed the evening.

The entire recording lasted for just under two hours. Given that the programme usually lasts for 30 minutes, and I would imagine that even if this one, being the Christmas special, is longer, it will be edited fairly severely, so I guess some of the readings won’t make it to the final cut.

My evening ended with another couple of queues, this time for the payment machines, and then the exit, to the carpark. Chatting to some of my fellow queue-ers we agreed that this was a less exciting queue that the earlier one!



The readings (as far as I can remember them) were extracts from:

The Maze Maker - Michael Ayrton
“Stocks & Stones” -John Buchan
The Specialist -Charles Sale
The Evolution Man -Roy Lewis
The Book of Job (Chapter 9)
On Aerial Navigation - Sir George Caley
Epilogue to The Origin of Species- Charles Darwin
The HitchHikers Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
The Napoleon of Notting Hill
- G.K. Chesterton
Household Noises - Paul Jennings

Also readings from Mark Twain and P.J. O’Rourke